Here veggie, veggie, veggie... come here girl...

Last night I wanted a quesadilla. So, I had one. bUT I decided I should sneak in some veggies.  I mean, they are just sitting in my fridge getting lonely anyway.  Before, they knew what hit 'em, I had cheese, tomatoes, and broccoli in there.  Man, was it yummy! Plus, afterwards I felt pretty good about it. Hell yeah, it had a ton of cheese in it (I can't change who I am) but it had more veggies than it would have had and that, my friends, is what I call a step.

So, now I am a quitter and still fat. Fat quitter.

I haven't been here lately, I realize this.  Mostly, it has been on purpose.  The eating has not been good and the exercise has been non-existent.  while I have lost a couple measly pounds, it really has more to do with not eating as much, me thinks, as eating correctly.  Great Scott, I have not been eating right.  In the past month I may have had 5 servings of veggies. total.  Two of those were in the past week. 
There is nothing to blame it on except myself. 

However, I bought a lot of veggies, and much less crap, at the store this week so there's some hope. 

How the hell do I find the motivation?  Seriously, nothing helps.  I look to myself, I look to others, the internet, I don't know what else to do.  Nothing I tell myself and nothing others tell me does anything.

It will come to me.  I will figure this out.  I will beat this.

Yeah, I say it but as I type it, I know it is not true.